Controls Kit Forums

Filed under: Lifestyle, MomsIt is 3 AM and I have been jolted from a deep slumber, for once not by the baby but by my cat, who is stationed outside our bedroom window yowling. I try very very hard to ignore her but she manages to penetrate the walls of the house with every meow. I poke my husband gently, then a little less gently. "WHURGH," he says, mid-snore. Wow. Mow. MEOW. WOW.I lurch out of bed and tiptoe past the silent bassinet to the front door, which I try and open quietly, but my actions are rendered moot as a fat black furball streaks inside voicing her complaints at top volume. I never knew a cat to make so much goddamn noise. I manage to corral her into the laundry room and shut her in there, her last yowl echoing down the hallway after me.Back in our bedroom, I once again slink past the bassinet but my thrilling return seems to have excited the dog, who gets up and shakes herself all over. She's filled with stupid Lab joy. Her tail thumps once, twice against the bassinet -- OBOY, OBOY, YOU'RE BACK -- and I do a little panicked dance, hissing shh! shhh! SHH!I finally entice the dog to get back in her bed via some frantic pointing and whispered commands, and I crawl gratefully back under the covers. Please, I think to myself. Pleeeeeeease.Suddenly a wet chomping noise fills the bedroom as the dog begins to gnaw at her own butt with a frenzy. Monchmonchmonchmonch. At the same moment, the weak latch on the laundry door gives way with a clatter and I hear the cat push the door open and walk down the hall to our room, meowing. Wow! Perroow! Merrh! Mah!The dog is now licking herself. Slup. Slup. Slup. Slup. The cat is sticking her paw under our door. Scrape. Scrape. Scrape.And of course, the baby is waking up. Eh. Eh. Eh. Ehhhhhhhhh.I entertain a vivid fantasy of cramming both pets into a sausage grinder. From one end protrudes their furry, useless rumps, from the other: fatty meat products. Then I get up, because what the hell, everyone ELSE is awake. Except my husband, but I go ahead and fix that with a well-aimed kick.Permalink | Email this | Linking Blogs | Comments



Posted at http://feeds.bloggingbaby.com/~r/weblogs...262046168/
Comments: http://www.parentdish.com/2008/04/01/the.../#comments